A Day Worth Remembering

Yes, I'm officially 20 now. Not YET 21. But will be soon =)

Mum called me up just before she went to bed to wish me happy birthday. That was before it was 12am. Hui Li wished me on msn =) Then MZ on fb and a few others. And then at 12am, messages started pouring in. Teeheee! I thought none would rmb. Maybe I exaggerated it. I thought FEW would remember. Here's the many people I have to thank for making the day a great one, my very first birthday away from home, a blessed one and a wonderful one =)

Surin: I know you started it all, you planned it all. And you got your mum to drop us at secret recipe. Although your acting wasn't that of a hollywood standard (LOL it was pretty shitty you know), but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the kindness you have shown to me, not only on my birthday but for my whole 2 years here. I love your bracelet! =)

Michelle: Miss Gayathri (I love calling you that. Or Rajaretnam, your father LOL), you weren't a very great actress yourself and in fact you ruined their plan LOL but you know how much I really want to thank you for the Pride and Prejudice (it's perfect. PERFECT!), the sleepover, the dinner that Phoebe made, the comfortable bed, the maggi mee breakfast and milo, the tea, the curry puffs and all. And also I have to thank your mum and dad. The walk around Country Heights, with Mr Koh and a whole lot of dogs, and some cina ah pek yelling at us. HAHAHA. And thank you for the cake at secret recipe =) I read your letter and I trully forgive you for running low on cash. It made me feel so divine and angelic =) Thank you for EVERYTHING. I've got your back, and I know you've got mine =) Love you.

Shelva: Thanks for being part of the plan as well. Whack Mich for ruining part of it. Thanks for the cake too. Thanks for the soon-to-be-received handphone pouch all the way from Hong Kong. LOL Thanks for coming over for Kajang satay with Praveen =)

Sooi: I already thanked you. No need for a second time LOL

Siao Wei: I also did previously.

Lameena: Thank you for that beautiful little bear you bought me. Loved it. His name is Pudding by the way LOL

Fen, NC, CJ: I already thanked you guys. But you left for gentings this morning without telling me! ARGHH!! I don't have class today, you know! =(

Danis: LOL thank you for singing me the birthday song. It wasn't very nice but hahaha..=D And thank you for the failed surprise you ought to have given me if it wasn't because I went over to Mich's. Plus the cake! You just had to buy me a chocolate cake to add on to my already excessive weight. But again, thank you.

Carrie, Christopher: Thank you for the pig. Very funny *smirks* Wait till I get home.

Aunts, Jeunn Ling: Thank you for the ang pau! =DDDD Enough for my shopping spree =)

Everyone who text messaged me: I can't name everyone. But you know who you are.
Can't wait to see all of you =)

Everyone who sent me a wall post on fb: Thank you so much!

Great but tiring day indeed =)

Mum's buying me an ice cream cake when I get back this weekend. HEEEEE!!! =D

ps: No thank yous for you this year, kar how. I still can't comprehend the fact that you...NEVERMIND. I hold you to your words of 2 westlife tickets in malaysia, a dinner/lunch, and a soft toy. NO TEDDY BEARS. And it's got to be something cute. *grins*

I'm 20

Tick tock tick tock tick tock...

I'm officially 20! =D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Fun Fair!

Saturday was pretty dull honestly. So there wasn't anything worth noting in here. Sunday, I thought, would be just the same. But no, it was a much better day than Saturday. Fen, my housemate was planning to have dinner at Secret Recipe with Ngie Chang and then she asked if I wanted to tag along. Argh, I already ate my dinner! I don't wana be a hippopotamus! =S But when she mentioned the word "cake", ahh! I was so up for it! =D Then, she later told me bout her "haunted" house which she would be staying rather soon when she leaves for Seremban, our clinical years. It's bad enough that our clinical years would be the most dire and dreadful years, so her "house" didn't help at all. Sigh.



Then, we decided we should go to the fun fair at the stadium since we had nothing else to do (a pretty bored lot we are). Cheng Jun joined us later. There were tonnes of people there OH MY GOD. And it's been so long since the fair was here, that I could even remember the music banging at my ears during my summative study break! And it was really cool. Obviously it isn't as cool as the ones in Genting (there are less games here), but it's pretty something. You know the ones we have in Penang, the Pesta thingy? Yeah, that's bout it. But anyways, the key issue here is that we took this really crazy ride, the Challenger. It didn't look that scary as we stood there watching it. But when we were on it, trust me, it's definitely not for the faint-hearted. I thought it would be just a piece of cake for me but it was one hell of a ride. it went up almost 120 degrees in mid air, imagine u sitting there with a piece of metal flap in front of u and a seat buckle, and two metal bars at the side for you to grab on, and your feet dangling in mid air, and your spectacles are being removed, you could really see nothing except the lights flickering from below. And there you are, screaming your lungs out. And all that is going through your mind for the past 5 minutes was "SHIT, I'm going to die". Honestly. And your butt is constantly being lifted up and you just have to hold on to the metal bar for your dear life.



As soon as in ended, we came out and our hands were just trembling. And we couldn't even walk straight. So much for wanting more of the adrenaline rush. LOL

Clockwise: Ngie Chang, Cheng Jun, Me and Fen =)

So we came back, cos we knew we wouldn't be able to take another boost of the adrenaline. LOL (and they call themselves guys..tsk). Will miss them loads =)

Randomness

Today was ok. Nothing out of the box. Nothing exceptionally extraordinaire and bizarre. Watched "Get Smart" at Midvalley. Was absolutely humorous. Anne Hathaway was really good. I'm sorry I am never a fan of Steve Carrell. Neither do I watch The Office. The Rock was WAY TOO HOT!! OUCH! You should've seen us going "AHHhhhhh" *melts* when he appeared. Plus, I didn't like the fact that Anne Hathaway kissed Steve Carrell too. So yeah, a 6/10. An additional 0.5 marks for its unstoppable laughters. =D

And then I came home. Absurdly bored. No plans for the weekend. It's just pathetic! I'm sorry I'm not more of a social butterfly. Then again, maybe I'm not. I need to be alone at times. Ok. Maybe most of the time I am alone here. That explains why the blogging spell is being so much of a salvage for my pityful soul. I like writing, anyway. Fine. Typing, in this manner.

Then I watched "Becoming Jane". It was stupendous. Complete flawless acting by both Anne Hathaway and James McAvoy (one of my most favourite actors of all times since "Children Of Dune"). They were just stunning. In case any of you haven't already know, it is the love story of the timeless, classic English novelist, Jane Austen herself. And that lucky guy (or maybe not so lucky afterall *spoiler*) was Tom Lefroy. Of course, Anne Hathaway isn't very much English in it, but still, she was absolutely gorgeous and wonderful. It just amazes how beautiful she is. Even in "Get Smart", she's every man's dream. For a moment, I wished I was a guy. Her eyes, her lips, they're so intoxicating! And there's no denying that James McAvoy is one hell of a talented actor. And he's really getting very good at it. Too bad he's married =( Maggie Smith and Julie Walters stars as the supporting cast (the former being Professor McGonagall and the latter being Mrs Weasley in Harry Potter LOL..I'm sorry I just couldn't help it). Great performance. A complete 9/10 ratings. It would've possibly been a 10/10 if only the ending was what I wanted to see. LOL I like happy endings! Sad endings make me depress! =(

Somehow, I just have a knack for such movies. Those set in the early centuries of England. Take "Pride and Prejudice" for example. I just adore it to bits. I've watched it over and over again until I lost count of the number of times it played on my DVD player back at home, and here. Although I haven't watch Colin Firth's Hallmark version of it, which I'm sure I'd love it just the same as Kiera Knightley's portrayal as Elizabeth. I wouldn't say I'm a huge fan of Jane Austen. In fact, it's a little embarassing to say that I've only quite learned a little more of her after watching PnP. But of course I do know who she is and what novels she wrote. I ain't that ignorant. Maybe someday, when I have a little more time to spare and a whole library dedicated to me, I'd read Sense and Sensibility, Emma and Mansfield Park.

"Atonement" is another of my favourite. At least it was when Hollywood started to take notice of James McAvoy. But be warned, for those soft at heart, you wouldn't like the ending. It's too depressing. Very. Sigh. "The Other Boleyn Girl" was brilliant as well. Very in line with the English history and very dramatic! Love it to bits as well. History has always been my favourite subject just in case none of you know. Especially the ones that are "non-Tanah Melayu atau Asia Tenggara atau Sabah Sarawak" LOL Plus I like how bitchy Natalie Portman is OWH!!! Eric Bana is just amazing, so is Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman. I love seeing women in those big frolicky gowns, with their hair all in curls and tied up. And I love the English accent! =)

As silly as it may sound, at times I wished my life was that dramatic as well. I mean dramatic in a good way, with a happy note to the end. I don't want my life to just end like Jane Austen's. Unmarried in the end and died at such an early age of 41. Of course she's now one of the most noted novelists in history but then again, "what's the pleasure in life when we can't be together?" by Tom Lefroy to Jane. How I wish life could be more of a fairytale.

Lost

• I don't think I know what I want
• I think I'm going crazy
• I must have a bipolar disorder
• I'm feeling ecstatic for a moment
• I'm depressed the next
• I think I'm bored
• I don't know what is it that can satisfy me
• I think I hate everyone
• I think I'm not getting what I want
• I can't sleep
• I'm too tired
• I dream bout cockroaches and other weird stuff
• I think my 28 days is up
• I think I'm just not me

And I'm suicidal...

The Exploding Belly

Ugh..my stomach is on the verge of bursting. No. More like there's a detonator fixed in it and it's just gonna give its way anytime soon. My god. All my diet-crashing and weight-watching and the excruciating pain top up with the pain-staking efforts of trying to shed the pounds and holding back myself while I watch eagerly as my favourite foods passed me by, IS CURRENTLY DOWN THE STUPID DRAIN. I mean not that I'm exceedingly fat and all, but you know that's what girls do best. And you can never stop a girl or lady or woman from her trying-to-lose-weight scheme. DAMN.

To start it off, the guilt hasn't even left my bleeding heart since I took the tiramisu and chocolate cake last night. And to add to that already alarming weight that I've been gaining for the past months, there was blackforest cake this noon, specially bought for our birthday girl, Shelva. And due to my extremely, utterly greedy behaviour, I took an enormous piece out of it. Enough is enough. Then again, maybe not quite. Italiannese came banging at my doorstep just an hour ago. Sooi, her mum and me ate so much that it felt like it was our last meal on my graciously, beautiful earth. Sigh.

Clams.

Grilled chicken.

Garlic chicken pizza.

Salad.

Capuccino pie.

Yes. All of which is an absolute hazard to my weight. To OUR weight. Just shoot me in the head. But I swear, that capuccino pie we had for desert was undeniably scrumptious. Yum!! But I'm betting that only a 100km worth of jogs and runs, top it up with 10 hours of calories-burning exercise would be able to shed it all off. MMmhmm.

But then again, how can anyone complain when there's good food? And for a person like me, food is in my blood, in my soul. I live for food. That's it. It's my very weakness. Sigh.

A huge thank you to aunty, who paid for the exceptionally expensive meal (at least to me) and thanks to Sooi who bought my groceries for me =) I seriously don't know what I'd do without you. Have a safe journey home tomorrow and I'll see you either when I'm back in pg or when we're both back here. =D Love you tonnes! *hugs n kisses*

Post-exams

Exams are officially over. Wait. Maybe not. I still have my selective exams to go. And maybe EOS 5 in the next 6 months. Then again, who cares bout selectives. I mean I do since it carries a certain percentage for EOS 5 (I have such messy brains). And EOS 5 is well, considerably still quite far ahead and maybe not too far either. But let's just finish one thing at a time.


Summative was over. I definitely did not work as hard as I did for all previous summatives and exams. I don't know. Maybe it's getting a bit too much to handle (whoever said medicine was easy). And the post-exam fever immediately sanked in. Went home and gobbled down loads of good food. I mean LOADS. My belly is already showing itself =( Sighs. We celebrated my birthday and mum's too. Her's belated, mine in advance. It's a depressing thought that my 20th this year would be in vista here. I mean, can it get any more pathetic??!!

Daddy's little girl

Mummy and me

Met up with Siao Wei as well. Still as bubbly as always =) Thank you siao po for the gift! Love that gloss from Lancome Paris =D I want a Mac one next year. LOL (too much to ask for. tsktsk)

And I coincidentally bumped into Mou Zheng at New World Park! Still the same =)

A very big thank you to Sooi who's done so much for me today. She bought me 2 pieces of cake; Tiramisu and Chocolate to sorta celebrate my birthday in advance cos she'll be in penang then already. And she bought me (.....) nevermind that, and a apple-scented candle which I really like =) Then we headed over to pasar malam for a fiesta to satisfy our roaring appetite and ended up eating so much! Then we headed back to vista for my cake cutting ceremony =D hahahah!

Stupidly ugly

Poor child deprived of cakes and oh-so-fattening-yet-extremely-delicious foods

For that, I am truly thankful to this absolutely wonderful friend cum sis of mine =) Definitely something I'd remember forever.

Since I should not be studying anything at all for now (theoretically and literally speaking in my context), I am planning to enjoy as much as possible. Just a tad sad that Sooi's going back on thursday already and noone's accompanying me throughout this post-exam period. Hopefully my dvds'd serve me well.

Tomorrow might be an interesting one too =)

Euro 2008 finals

AHHhhh!! It would've been so much better if Germany had won the game this morning =(

Dad and I stayed up till 2.45am (mum was snoring away), and despite our eyes being half-closed, that sheer determination of wanting to watch the game so badly after being deprived of it throughout the league (vista has no bloody astro, idiot) made me squint my eyes so badly. LOL


I've loved football for as long as i could remember, thanks to my cousin brother who just couldn't stop going "GOALLLLLL!!!" everytime the football season is around the corner. And he was the very person who introduced me to my now all-time favourite, Manchester United!


Anyways, history aside. When Fernando Torres scored that goal, my heart just stopped beating. OUCH. And my dad just had to add to my already breaking heart that all his friends were betting on Spain to steal the cup away from my beloved Germany. Sigh. Ok fine. Maybe Spain was way more consistent than Germany. But Germany is such a talented squad altogether and I would really love seeing them win.

Torres scoring, Lahm looks on =(

Hate you, Torres. But still love you =( *rihanna and ne-yo "hate that I love you so" playing*

My defeated Ballack *sobs*

If only it were the Germans. Spain-Germany : 1-0

And so, the Euro 2008 has officially ended. Looking forward to the next 4 years again. But before that, the 2010 World Cup! GO GERMANY! And England! For the coming World Cup. God save England =)

Queen Of My Heart

...+ The Queen Of My Heart +...

Mummy,

I'm sorry I'm not very good with words,

And so very often, uncountable, numerous times,

I let you down, I made you cry,

"Sorry" was all I could say everytime, and time and time again,

Never learning my lesson well.

Despite all that I put through,

The masked pain and agony,

You were the only who has never given up hope on me,

The light which I hold on to when night dawns on me,

The friend and the soul to whom I lay my head on,

The very person who cheered me on this path of which I have chosen.

Thank you for the timeless effort, dedication, love and care you have put into my life,

Thank you for just being there anytime, anywhere,

Thank you for being the greatest gift God could ever give me,

And thank you for just being you.

...+ Happy Birthday Mummy!!! +...

I'm sorry this sounds like a Mother's Day post. Oh well, there's no certain time or occassion to express your love to a loved one =) Love you, Mee!!

Germany!

GERMANY'S IN!!!

Bastian Schweinsteiger =)

Miroslav Klose =)

Ballack the Man =D

"Three-time European champions Germany are into the semi-finals after a dramatic 3-2 victory over Euro 2004 finalists Portugal on Thursday in Basel." - quote The Star.

I'm sorry. I should be studying very hard at this point. But WAY TO GO GERMANY!!! Must've been a great game. If only I was able to watch it. Boohoo =( Anyways,


GO GO GERMANY!!!

The Unforgiving Time

Isn't it funny how time seems to slip by you when you're happy?
Isn't it funny how it creeps so slowly behind you when you're terribly sad?
Isn't it funny how unforgiving it can be?
Isn't it funny?

Isn't it weird that I have to do the things we used to do together, now alone?
Isn't it weird that just a minute ago I was holding your hand and yours in mine?
Isn't it weird that I used to wake up in mornings with you greeting me and that now it's just me?
Isn't it weird to come home with noone behind that door except the merciless silence?
Isn't it weird that just 2 hrs ago we had each other and now it's you and me at two different places?


I miss you =(

Of charity dinner, flu, accidents and pure bad luck

The charity dinner on Friday night was great. I mean not that I'm glad there's a charity fund raising event for such a disaster but I just thought it was a great way to help those involved. 400 tables were allocated. 400! Wow.. And each was Rm2000. Of course, mine was FOC heeee =D Volunteers were collecting donations everywhere, each with a small box in their arms. And you can never miss out the rich-and-famous in events like these.


So the night started with all your when-is-this-gonna-end speech by the rich and famous. And then there was food. I am sincerely sorry that all I thought about at that point was food rather than oh-how-sad-this-is. So did my aunt by the way LOL Then the opening performance was a dance and oh my god, that performance was absolutely beautiful. Stunning. Im sorry there aren't any pics of it in here but it just took my breath away. So much so that I forgot to snap a few shots of it. =( Then there's Ling Yu Zhong ( if you don't already know, he's an upcoming Chinese Malaysian singer, appearing in AEC a lot these days ).. and Ah Niu and some other guy I dont know. And the list of performances goes on and on..








For those who can't read Chinese, it means "Earthquake has no mercy, but Malaysians have love" in direct translation. And yes, I couldn't read it either thank you.






Lurveee the candle light effect!!

That's Ling Yu Zhong, or however you spell his name.

Me and my aunt =)

But the most captivating and touching moment was during the poem recital. It isn't exactly a poem, they just recited it like a story. And it was almost like watching a real drama on tv. And for a moment, I thought I was there at the scene as well. First was a lady, who spoke of the different people at their bravest moments at different times and place. And it was filled with so much of passion and so much emotion that it almost made me cry as well. Then there was a little girl, probably of age 11 or 12, and a woman. And they acted out a scene as well. That was it. I could just feel the overwhelming emotion from from the two cos they were just superbly excellent and for a girl that young, you really have to give her all the credits. And they both cried. The emcees interviewed them, and asked the little girl what was her advise to the earthquake victims, she replied so maturedly, as compared to any of the girls her age "Dont give up. We will be with you till the very end".

That wraps up the whole night. A very heart warming one indeed =) A big thank you to my aunt!

Now back to reality (you know im always away from it gah!), the flu bug caught up. And I just hate it. It just ruins everything you know. Im already really lacking behind in my studies, havent even done half of endocrine, and here I am sneezing my nose away. WTH. Whoever who spread this bug to me, CURSE YOU!!! grrrr..and because I have allergies and all that, it makes the whole ordeal worse. ISH!!

And then, I nearly got smashed up by the barricade in front of vista B. That idiot guard plainly and clearly had no brains nor eyes to see and to know that we were all passing by. And just because I was the front most person, with Huda walking behind me, it just obviously hit me. ASSHOLE. A big thank you to Huda who yelled at him for me =DD

The string of bad luck doesn't just end there. While I was at pasar malam with Sooi on tues night, with the rain pouring down on my stupid face, my sandals just gave its way. GREAT. Here I am, trying to protect myself from getting wet, there it goes putting me in more agony and humility for I had to drag it all the way back to the car. GEEEEE THANKS!!

Mishaps aside. We visited the dialysis centre yesterday and it was definitely an eye-opener. I never knew that it would put the patients into so much of pain, trouble and hassle. I mean, your life is altered forever. You have to restrict your diet, come for dialysis 3 tiems a week, each session lasting for 4 hours, have a fistula done on your arm for the needle to go through and mind you, the needle is just humungous!! And all the commitment one has to put into it, it was just a sad sight. Very sad. And I was just telling Vivien, if ever I had end stage renal disease (renal failure) , and if i cant get a kidney transplant, I'd just probably go to India and buy one and get it illegally done there. LOL I dont wana spend the rest of my life living and depending ona dialysis machine! The mental torture, together with the physical is just unbearable. But I learnt alot from it. The sister as great. Everything was great except that the fact that IMU staff are just to lazy that they couldnt even draw us a map.

Anyways, its been a long one. Looking forward to home tomorrow. =) Don't look forward to any updates soon. Exam's near and I think I really need to lock in 5th gear. Tutuusss!! =D

Disaster strikes

spoken: Think about the generations and to say we want to make it a better world for our children and our children's children. So that they know it's a better world for them; and think if they can make it a better place.

There's a place in your heart And I know that it is love

And this place could be much Brighter than tomorrow.

And if you really try You'll find there's no need to cry

In this place you'll feel There's no hurt or sorrow.

There are ways to get there

If you care enough for the living

Make a little space, make a better place.

Chorus: Heal the world

Make it a better place

For you and for me and the entire human race

There are people dying

If you care enough for the living

Make a better place

for You and for me.

If you want to know why

There's a love that cannot lie

Love is strong It only cares for joyful giving.

If we try we shall see

In this bliss we cannot feel

Fear or dread We stop existing and start living

Then it feels that always

Love's enough for us growing

Make a better world, make a better world.

Chorus: Heal the world

Make it a better place

For you and for me and the entire human race.

There are people dying

If you care enough for the living

Make a better place

for You and for me.

Bridge: And the dream we would conceived in

Will reveal a joyful face

And the world we once believed in

Will shine again in grace

Then why do we keep strangling life

Wound this earth, crucify it's soul

Though it's plain to see, this world is heavenly

Be God's glow.

We could fly so high

Let our spirits never die

In my heart I feel You are all my brothers

Create a world with no fear

Together we'll cry happy tears

See the nations turn

Their swords into plowshares

We could really get there

If you cared enough for the living

Make a little space to make a better place.

There are a lot of stories unheard of. How their survival instincts lead them to do what they did. It's sadly unfortunate that the aftershocks are hitting them again. 15 million displaced. 15 million. Death toll have now increased to 70,000. Or maybe more now. I suppose i can call China part of my home too because my granddad and my grand uncles are all fr china itself, which makes me a quarter of being a real mainland chinese (forgive me for my not-so-accurate mandarin please). And to know that Malaysian Chinese (or the entire Malaysian community, i'm not quite sure) have donated a colossal amount of RM15 million, is definitely something worth noting. I'm looking forward to this Friday's charity dinner at Mines with my aunt. Will talk about it soon.

guitar heroes

LOL thank you to hui fang who showed me this..really loved it to bits!! =DD

and like i said to hui fang..* I secretly wished archie would take off his pants too * LOL

david arculeta and one republic

I'm sorry i just have to put this in here! oh my god david.. you make me want you more!

I'm sorry i'm verging on being desperate here but somebody just hold me back..HELP!!

I take what i said previously. Maybe David Archuleta deserves to win a little bit more than Cook..ouch..but I still love you Cook =DD

Of Buses and Trains

It's amazing how complex the human mind can be. Have you ever had this moment, where you'd just be sitting down at your table, and then you get lost in your pool of thoughts. So many things running through your mind. From what lunch'll be tmr, to how about dinner tonight? And then, how you get to where you are today, to what happens next to the China earthquake victims. And then, you forget what you were thinking of just a second ago. So much so that it amazes you that one could think of so many a things at one particular moment.


Anyways, I went home for the Wesak day celebration. And as usual, the temples were packed like sardines. Would never missed out a chance to follow the procession though. It was absolutely beautiful. I don't know if there are any of these in KL or not.


Chronicles of Narnia (Prince Caspian) was absolute brilliant for your info. And I really have to admit that all of them had better acting skills than my beloved Daniel Radcliffe. (I still love you Daniel=) And oh my, Edmund (Skandar Keynes) is soooo very hot! Since when did his testosterone levels shot up this high??!! Take me with you,Edmund!! LOL Quote Michelle: Oh my god, since when did we become paedophiles??!! LOL

Sigh..every girls' dream =) *melts*

Here's to another great news. The new American Idol has finally been crowned. As much as I want David Archuleta to win, I wanted Cook to win as well. So basically, I'm torn apart. I think they both really deserved it, and this is probably the most talented and interesting season there has been. There were already tonnes of speculations that it was gonna be a showdown between the two Davids. And true enough, it was. I didn't like Cook's performance last night that much as compared to his previous ones and Archuleta's, and I seriously would've stood by Simon. But then again, credit has to be given for the courage and effort they've both put in and to be able to stand in front of millions of people is something worth applauding for. Here's to Archie who never fails to mesmerize me with his rendition of "imagine" and "heaven" and to Cook for "always be my baby". Cant wait for their albums!! No pirated copies please, people. =D

His crowning glory.

David david david david!!

On to the not so happy news, when I found out about the earthquake that hit Sichuan, China from my mum, it didn't hit me hard enough yet as to how much damage it cost. Until my aunt told me she was literally crying when she the news on tv, then only did I surfed the net for more pics and info. It was plain horrible. I mean, it isn't just about how many people who're dead, and how many more are left trapped underneath all the rubble, but the damage that it brings to the survivors as well as their families is incomprehensible. Imagine your life being scarred forever. It's the aftermath that needs to be tended to. And at the same time, rescue and relief efforts have to go hand in hand. What's the use of getting people out of there when they're probably gonna die in the end without proper food, water and sanitation. It's a sad, sad world out there. Fathers and mothers dead, children gone...*sigh*

My heart goes out to those griefing and to the survivors. I wished the world would be a better place to live in for all.

Hallucinations and fantasies

I just don't seem to understand people of the opposite sex. And i've always wondered why God created them in the first place. I mean other than the fact that opposite sex attracts each other, and they have sex and boom, out comes a baby to expand the horizon of humanity, I see no other reasons as to why they even exist. They're just impossible to be with! They think so highly of themselves and that they're so cute and hot and at anytime of the day, they can get any kind of girl they want. They're just absolutely, utterly absurd and ridiculous. Hello, if i'm nice to you doesnt mean i have a thing for you. In case you're wondering, I should suggest that each and everyone of you buy yourself a mirror. Stop fantasizing and hallucinating like i know you always do. Don't even venture into thinking and believing that you're any ladies' man. Don't even go there. You're way too out of place.

All of the above totally does not apply to my 2 weeks faci for pbl, Dr. Tan. Oh my god, he's so cute. Scratch that. LOL

ps: sigh Yee Hui Fang, I really shouldn't have announced it to the world that i had a nickname of lebam. Now I'm making headlines in your blog. Thank you for the publicity. (She's gonna say she's welcome)

Home soon

Forget the "mariah carey" post. It was just one of those really bad days where everything comes crashing down on you. Where everything becomes topsy turvy. Sigh. Anyways, life isn't getting that much easier. The problem with me is, I keep wanting to go out, keep wanting to stay away from my lecture notes as much as possible. More like I want to have a life. Yeah, y'all know it. Medical students are deprived of a life. It feels like a student prison here. And the more I do that, the more the notes pile up. It does get to me really, but the fact that I'm not doing anything about it just irritates myself and I'm stressed because Im just not rectifying the problem.

Then I keep wondering if medicine is really my calling. I know I want to be there. In Africa, in Iraq and all those war-torn and poverty-stricken places that you can name of. But somehow, that reason is just not strong enough to assure myself that yes, I am doing the right thing at this very moment.

I don't know if I will ever stop asking myself this very same question. I know I do it rather often, especially those whom I confide in, they'd prob have heard this a million times in a year or so. I'm just mad at myself that Im going in circles, back to the point where it all started. Circles are bad ok. Sigh again.

Anyways, Im glad Im going home this Friday for Wesak day. Really can't wait to be home with mum. I've missed Mother's day for the very first time. And I feel really, really bad. Sigh thrice.


ps: Yee Hui Fang, call me lebam again and you shall wait for the day I come back and kick your ass. Han Yin's coming back! I guess. We have to get together! No exams excuses please. Lol

mad

I AM SOOO MAD NOW!
I JUST DON'T KNOW WHY!
EVERYTHING IS OUT OF PLACE.
EVERYTHING'S NOT RIGHT.
EVERY GIRL IS A BITCH
EVERY GUY IS A BASTARD
THE WORLD IS SO UNFAIR.

I know this is a little "mariah carey" kinda thing. Maybe cause i'm having one of those days in a 28 days cycle thing. You know what. ARGH! But those hormones are just raging up and down now! And i just really wanna kill somebody! Anybody!
My handphone's not working, my housemate's leaving soon, my lecture notes are way behind time, i haven't finish reading my pbl, i haven't started reading endocrine, exam's coming again

MY LIFE IS OUT OF CONTROL!

smelly tofu!

I had my first smelly tofu (chau tau fu) experience today and I really loved it !! =D Thank you Chee Sooi Phing! She probably would've burst out in pride after reading this. LOL But nonetheless, it was a wonderful night out =) I was expecting it to be really smelly, and garbagy, but it wasn't that bad afterall. In fact, it wasn't bad at all. Just a very mild longkang smell. LOL. But once its in your mouth, it tasted like any other ordinary tofu. YUMMMMM!!

Looking forward to next tuesday =)